August 14, 2015
The love and nurture of your authentic self is a radical thing in a patriarchy, especially for a woman. Patriarchy teaches women to reduce our sense of self, to become small physically and emotionally. We are encouraged to hide ambition in the cubbyhole of marriage, to seek validation of our internal sexuality from an external world that wishes to chew it up and spit it out rather than validate it, and to never listen to our internal voice, the one that says, this is my truth. A girl growing up in our current patriarchy, awash in these messages yet also fed their anecdote if she is fortunate—has a lot to figure out. And she must do so within the context of social media, which I have nicknamed Patriarchy’s Playground—a place where a girl becoming a woman must navigate the line between self and other while still learning, and becoming, who she is. The more she knows about the pitfalls that await her, the better. And the more she learns the radical art of self-love, the less vulnerable she will be to a world that wants to chew her up and spit her out.
July 23, 2015
The term mansplaining, unlike gaslighting, has entered mainstream conversation: according to Lily Rothman at The Atlantic, it first appeared online shortly after Rebecca Solnit’s piece in the LA Times, “Men Explain Things to Me.” Ms. Solnit didn’t use the term in her article, but she described a prime example of mansplaining, in which a man described her own book to her without acknowledging that she’d written it. The term is used so widely that it is misused: sometimes it’s used so broadly that it could apply to any situation in which one person is condescending to another, and sometimes it is completely misdefined, as it is in many of the definitions in the urban dictionary, one of which asserts that man-hating women use the term to spread their man-hating. Despite these misunderstandings, mansplaining is easy to spot, as any woman who has experienced it can tell you.